Do you have some Spazmatic in you?


No, it is not a line that the lead guitarist uses to pick up young ladies at the Cedar Street Courtyard in Austin (well not that I know of, and if it isn’t, it should be) but more a question.

Do you have some Spazmatic in you?

I guess it would help if y’all knew who The Spazmatics are. Well you could Bing them (I now have Windows 10 and apparently I cannot write the G word any more) but instead let me take you on a journey of sight and sound using the wonderful medium of typed letters arranged into something that smart people call words.

The Spazmatics are a 80s cover band based in Austin (but you can start a franchise in a city near you) that play every Wednesday night at Cedar Street and also have other gigs (one would presume). They dress thematically – bass player wears a skid lid, lead singer has a foam neck brace, lead guitar looks like a vertically challenged Bjorn Borg and the drummer dresses like an 80’s nerd (if he was to dress present-day nerd he would most likely have dreads and work for Google). I have seen them before and when a friend (who we will call The Family Guy) suggested them as an option the other night in Austin I knew that we needed to see them again because, quite simply, they are a butt tonne (metric value) of fun.

Why James, why are they fun?

Well, apart from the fact that I am old and 80s music takes me back to the good old days The Spazmatics have no inhibitions when it comes to having fun on stage and that lack of inhibition and the quest for the audience to enjoy the music as much as they do makes their gigs, as stated before, a butt tonne of fun. Another example of people lacking inhibitions when it comes to entertaining people is the famous Cow Bell sketch from Saturday Night Live. As good as that sketch is with Ferrell and Walken and the need for more Cow Bell the bit that sets it over the top was the request from Ferrell after dress rehearsal for a smaller top – his lack of shame of his Dad bod is the cherry on the top of one of SNLs greatest ever skits.

Now I am not in any way recommending that people should wear clothing that is way too small for them (unless they are shopping at WalMart – or actually look good in Daisy Dukes) but you get the idea. A harmless bit of silliness often can go a long way. I once attended a tacky t-shirt party wearing a ladies medium shirt with the words “I can out drink all you bitches” written on it, I also added a fake tattoo butterfly tramp stamp and arm band – I have the blinged out goblet I won sitting at home. For those of you who don’t know me I am a bit larger than ladies medium. Funniest thing was the lady who arrived wearing the same shirt who then admitted I looked better in it than she did (that was a lie obviously). Whatever – I made some new friends, had a laugh, and anyone who judged me as a fool based on my garb, well they were the ones with issues not me.

Sometimes you need to loosen the necktie and just be goofy. One of the favorite things I have ever done with my daughter is to grab her hand and skip as we head into a store – I did it the other day at work with the Sales Monkette and though we may have looked a little silly the desired outcome of laughter and smiles, well that made the silly just fine.

So do you have some Spazmatic in you? I am sure you do – so let it out some. Some of us worry way too much about what people think of them. Well guess what, sometimes peoples opinions don’t mean shit. If someone judges me to be stupid/odd/weird based on the fact I am skipping with my daughter then they really don’t know anything about the book, they are just judging one small part of the cover, and quite frankly because of that their opinions don’t mean a thing. To paraphrase a well-read book, there is a time for everything, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.

This Memorial Weekend in the US the best way we can honor those whose sacrifices gave us the ability to be free is to skip holding someone’s hand, laugh until our sides hurt and love the life that we are fortunate enough to have. To truly honor those gone before however we need to let our Spazmatic out on a regular basis in completely unforced and random ways. I once heard a woman say that even the small things can be amusing (she was obviously not talking to me – got to get in a dick joke somehow) so find those small things that amuse you and set them free.

As always the stories told here are fictional except for the ones that are not. Any similarity to any previous blog posts by me is purely accidental and only occurs because I forget shit. Anyone who goes to see the Spazmatics in Austin and is disappointed in the show is probably a dick. Anyone who sees me skipping into work better watch out or I might grab your hand also. Anyone who has read this far and has not smiled at least once needs to read this post again and try to fucking understand what I am saying. The rest of you, you are free to leave.

So work hard, play hard and earn your inspiration


Happy Poets Day.

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