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Showing posts from March, 2016

God invented the scroll wheel for a reason

Well maybe not God himself as he is way to busy posting pictures of cute puppies peeing on angel's wings on Heavenagram but the inventor is probably someone that he is LinkedIn to. Quick spoiler alert this post is most likely to have a few sweary words in it. So this week boys and girls and people with gender identity issues we are going to talk about the whiny fucking idiots who just need to bitch at shit because they seem to have nothing better to do. Most specifically this is in regard to Candice Galek and her promotion of her business on LinkedIn. I just had a quick look at the latest 15 posts on LI and I saw 6 product ads, 5 puff pieces (pretty much product ads), 3 job postings and a picture of a group of people praying at work – I am actually surprised I didn’t see a math problem where people who can’t do basic fucking math are looking for clicks and reasons to say PEMDAS (hint if there are no parentheses then just work left to right, dipshits). I didn’t read the

All of DC is a stage and right now there are some serious players in town

Yes I know it is not Poets Day (yet) and your normal schedule of badly written egotistical blather will resume later this week but I wanted to quickly throw some letters together and hope they make sense regarding the wonderful weekend I just had in Washington DC. Firstly let’s talk about Othello starring Jonno Roberts (no relation unless he is doing a good show) and Faran Tahir. Sure the play is named Othello and in theory Faran was the star but it was a good show so in my mind Jonno get’s top billing J . I am not going to pretend that I like Shakespeare – hell, I never got to meet him so how can I, but I am guessing he would have bored the crap out of me a fair amount of the time unless he had an amazing cast like the one in DC telling his stories for him. It is ironic that people think that I am hard to understand and yet go and watch Shakespeare. Forsooth there are many parts of the bard’s work that are hard to follow given that we speak American English (well some of y’all do

A little less conversation, a little more action please

All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me You need to do yourself a favor, go on the Tube of You and watch the scene from Live a Little, Love a Little where Elvis drops this sick beat. For those of you without access to a computer I will quickly describe the scene and sit here wondering how you can read this electronic drivel without an electronic device. Are these blogs being printed in 2-ply and handed out on street corners? Anyway, Elvis basically starts singing, grabs the girl’s coat and walks her out of the party for what we can only assume is a little more action and a lot less conversation. I tried that once and lets just say that restraining orders can be quite, well, restraining :) So, you ask yourself, what journey are you taking us on this Poets Day James? Well today kids we are going to talk about Kiwi Sales Technique 101 more commonly known as “Let’s stop dancing and start fucking’ or ‘WIMFC’ (which stands for ‘Where is my fucking contract’). As