Don’t be a dick

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This phrase is often used at my work to describe someone who is not exactly being forthcoming with information or not fulfilling promises of action. I wasn’t sure why we used the phrase so much so decided to look into its origins.

After considerable research I have discovered that it started in England in the late 1100’s when Richard the Lionheart, or Richard I King of England was in power. He was not exactly a peaceful King, and would pick a fight with just about anyone for any reason. He famously beheaded a jester for stealing a joke from another jester – Dane Cook is lucky he wasn’t around back then. He also killed a peasant and his family for stopping short in front of his chariot – the original Chariot Rage. Not surprisingly then that the commoners coined the phrase “Nae be a King Richard” to describe someone that was in power and abused it. A royal order decreed in 1189 stated that describing someone as a ‘King Richard’ was punishable by death (further perpetuating the issue). The phrase was adjusted by the Poet Laureate (or Versifactor Regis) at the time, Richard Canonicus, to ‘Nae be a dick’, which was approved by the King as even though he was a dick, he was a dick with a sense of humor – which is something dicks have to have.

Once transatlantic travel started again in the 1600s the phrase moved to the New World and was Americanized originally in the south as ‘Y’all are being a dick’ and modified in New England to ‘Don’t be a clam chowder head’ – which was not as effective. It limped along in popularity as it was seen as a remnant of English rule, until it raised its head again in the mid 1960’s due to the activities of Richard Burton on the set of The Spy Who Came in from the Cold. ‘Don’t be a dick’ then really thrust itself into the limelight in the early 1970s thanks to the then President – Dick Nixon.

Quite frankly I think being a dick is useful and being called a dick, well it can be a compliment. However you can change the meaning of the phrase quite easily to insult as needed. For example:

‘Don’t be such a little dick’ - obviously not as useful

‘You’re such a big dick’ - complimentary

‘You dick face’ - yeah, definitely an insult, it’s not like dicks are attractive, not that I am a dick connoisseur but the one on David (the statue – not the guy that works at Legends) isn’t exactly inspiring

‘You fucking dick head’ – see above

Being called a dick is something that knows no sexual boundaries, woman can be dicks also. The suffrage movement really has come places since NZ was the first country to give women the right to vote. I have however coined a new word that might be more useful to you now you know that being a dick is not always a bad thing.

Bitch-dick

On this Poets Day we celebrate the being of dicks and the history of this iconic phrase. Let’s face it, we have all been dicks in the past and we are all likely to be dicks in the future. However if you are always a dick head then you are probably not the sort of person people like to be around.

So the next time someone calls you a dick you will know the origins of the phrase, but also know that the person using it probably means that you are being a fucking tool.

Don’t be a pussy and work hard, play hard and earn your inspiration.

Happy Poets Day